18th Oct 2015

Finally getting back on track, the path I was supposed to be on, prior to getting into my last relationship. 

Not that Im blaming the Rs for bringing me off course. But I guess I put too much of myself into it, and ending up derailing myself. It wasn’t the RS or the guy. I guess it was something that I thought I had to do to make the rs work.

Exercise routine is back on track after I pin point the reason for my procrastination.. After shifting my workout session to evenings, Im getting out of my house earlier and also jumping straight into my workout upon reaching home 😉 

Lovely, back to twice a week of weights and core exercises. ( I was randomly doing once a week, or even once every 2 weeks for a long time…) Next.. time to add back the HIIT sessions, which had been missing since.. I don’t know! ><

In an attempt to actually get around to reading “The Success Principles”, decided to divide it into bite size bits. Minimum of at least one 1 chapter a day, 64 chapters in total. The plan is to read it on the bus, on my way to work. Im up to chapter 3 today 😀

Pondering how to reprogram my subconscious mind. I’ve heard so many motivational speakers mention that the subsconcious mind is the one that really controls everything. Really got to get to it. 

“Like an iceberg the conscious mind is just 1/6th and is seen above the water. While the unconscious mind is 5/6th and is not seen and needs to be reprogrammed.”

Almost finished reading “Rejection Proof”. I realised just how much of my life is structured around avoiding rejection at all cost. If I don’t have a 101% chance of getting it, I probably won’t do it. And I probably won’t ask for something as well. Just how much have I missed in life becos of this fear?

Trying to make it a point of asking for things. Rejection is a myth. It’s all in our mind. People simply take rejection too personally. Don’t we all?

“When you asked and got rejected you are no worse than when you were before you asked because you didn’t have it in the first place before you asked.” – Jack Canfield, The Success Principles

“Rejection is just an opinion, remember? It reflects them more than me, right? ” – Jia Jiang, Rejection Proof

“Rejection is an experience that it is up to you to define. In other words, it means only what you choose it to mean.” – Jia Jiang, Rejection Proof

A lot to ponder.

14th Oct 2015

So.. recently been trying to do some changes in my life. 

Minimalism. Need to implement minimalism, but this one is gonna take alot of work. Im still trying to schedule time to clear up all the stuff I dun need or love. I intend to just keep the things I need and love. Its amazing how much stuff can pile up… 

Procrastination. I realised I’ve been slacking around too much during my offdays. I might wake up early, but I can slack around for a few hours, and might not even be done with breakfast few hrs after waking up -_-

Usually, its becos I’m supposed to exercise, but I procrastinate. Well, I need to eat first. Then can only exercise one hr after. Usually, I watch drama while waiting for the one hr to pass, and end up dozing off O.O. Even if I did not doze off, I started feeling so lazy that my exercise timing drag until afternoon. 

Now I simply set my alarm for 7am everyday, without fail. Regardless of whether Im working or not. Then I just proceed with my usual workday routine on my offday. Wake up, shower, etc. Then I start to see my charts and prep for trading, and be done by 10+. Head out shortly after that for early lunch 😉 Exercise gets scheduled to evenings, 6 or 7pm. So far so good 😀

Diet. Trying to get a Paleo lunch during my offdays, as much as possible. If not possible, will try to eat less gluten / sugar / dairy. And try to squeeze in a smoothie :9 

Catching up on reading. Some fiction, mostly self enrichment books. 

And doing alot of thinking.

9th Oct 2015

In one of those moods where you have loads of stuff going thru your mind, so much that you can’t and don’t even know how to start processing or talking about them. 

Solitude is strangely comforting at this point in time. I just want to be left alone with my thoughts. 

Still trying to make my goals happen. Kept feeling so stuck. Thinking, is this really what I want?

If I really wanted it, why is it so hard to feel motivated?

I recalled this movie scene in Titanic, where Rose attempted to jump off the ship. 

“And all the while I feel like I’m standing in the middle of a crowded room, screaming at the top of my lungs, and no one even looks up.”

Thats the kind of feeling Im feeling. 

Overwhelmed. 

Tired. 

If life is a puzzle, it felt like Im misplacing all the pieces in this puzzle of life. 

I hate the feeling I get when I caught myself wondering : Wtf am I doing? 

And then I do it again anyway the next time. ZZz.  

There are so many things I want to do, yet don’t want to do. 

Bloody mid life crisis. Or maybe Im overdosing on Sugar. Haha. 

I think I need to go meditate or do a W30 or something. 

28th Sept 2015

Chanced upon Chicken Soup for the Romantic Soul the other day. Read the first story, and got hooked. It truly is Nourishment for the soul.

Another year older today. This morning, I received one of the most lovely bd present ever. When it comes to gifts, it’s always the thoughts that count 🙂

My choice of activities today, all my favorite things to do. Browsing at Kino, random reading at the library, cafe hopping.

My choice of cafe today : Curious Palette. They have the prettiest pancake!